Memorial Stones: Mapping Memorials in Everyday Life with Brenda Savanhu

Born in Harare, Zimbabwe, Brenda Savanhu’s journey has spanned continents and cultures. 

She spent her early years between England and Zimbabwe, before moving to the United States at the age of 18.

 From a young age, Brenda was an avid reader, finding comfort and inspiration in the pages of Nancy Drew mysteries and Agatha Christie’s Hercule Poirot. 

Brenda’s faith story is one of rediscovery. Though she first encountered Jesus as a teenager, it was in her early thirties—after a season of wandering—that she found herself drawn back into His embrace. 

This profound return to faith became the foundation for her book, Memorial Stones: A Guided Devotional Journal for Foundational Miracles in Your Life. 

Through her writing, Brenda encourages others to reflect on and celebrate the miracles that shape their spiritual journeys. 

Today, Brenda shares her story to inspire hope and faith in others, inviting them to recognize the hand of God in their own lives. 

In this episode, host Jan Johnson engages with Brenda Savannu, delving into the art of documenting life's spiritual journey through metaphoric memorial stones.

Brenda discusses how divine inspiration led her to create a book centered on pivotal moments where God's presence was profoundly felt. 

Drawing from scriptural references, specifically from the Book of Joshua, they explore how these recorded journeys not only serve as personal testimonials of faith but also facilitate community sharing, fostering deeper connections. 

Brenda shares how life events catalyzed her introspection, leading to a renewed faith and a unique way to chart her spiritual journey.

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Transcript

Jan: We discovered that we have a little bit in common and not our origin of birth or locations where we are, but gotta given both of us the same kind of a message.

And that was that we have journeys, and those journeys should be recorded,

paid attention to.

And so, as many of you know, I wrote the Bible study called Discovering your Journey. And in that we have a journal where we go through and map out the journey of our lives.

And your book Memorial stones.

Jan: 

Let's get in the Bible. And I am in Joshua first. I wanted to start in chapter 3:9.

And Joshua said to the Israelites, come here and listen to the words of the Lord your God. This is how you will know that the living God is among you and that he will certainly drive before you.

If that was all there was, that'd be the purpose for really recording the things that have happened in our lives.

And then chapter 4:5

Each of you is to take up a stone on his shoulder to serve as a sign among you.

In the future,

when your children ask you, what do these stones mean?

Tell them that the flow of the Jordan was cut off before the ark of the covenant of the Lord.

Then these stones are to be a memorial.

And of course, in our case,

we aren't crossing the river.

Well, maybe figuratively.

Brenda: Proverbial. Yeah, proverbial river.

Jan: And then verse 24,

he did this so that all the people of the earth might know that the hand of the Lord is powerful and so that you might always fear the Lord your God.

Brenda: Very, very powerful. Yeah.

Jan: So when. When you kind of got that little nudge from God to write your book. Tell us a little bit about it, just as to where it came from. 

Brenda: Yeah. 

So at 30. I was going through a divorce.

And, you know, that's a good time for reflection when you're going through a divorce.

So I was looking at my life, looking at my marriage, looking at my identity,

and there was so much disconnect because I realized that there were so many dreams and things that I had dreamt of as a little girl that I had completely discarded as a married woman.

And not intentionally, but just in the name of wanting to be a good spouse and supporting my husband at the time, his dreams.

And it was completely at my own expense.

So I was looking at all of that, and I read a couple books, and they just ignited in me. I realized, Brenda. you used to dream about doing this, and you used to dream about doing that.

I got in contact with one of my childhood friends. And I said to her, I don't know what happened to my faith.

And she was like, yeah, like, that's a good question for you to explore.

So I sat down and started thinking about it, and I was like, God, you showed up in such incredible ways when I was a teenager and. But, you know, going to college, getting.

married as a young adult, I completely just gradually pulled away from my relationship with Jesus.

I wasn't going to church regularly. I wasn't reading my Bible regularly. I wasn't praying regularly.

So that's kind of where it started. It started with that moment of just reflection, like, what's going on?

And I remember when that happened, like, that Sunday I went to church, and I hadn't been to church in a really long time, and I didn't even quite know what I was doing. I just knew I needed to get back into the presence of the Lord.

And then fast forward a few years later, I was doing Beth Moore's Believing God.

And so she talks about memorial stones in there.  Like, what are significant moments along your lifeline?

And so I was like, oh, this is a really cool idea. I charted it in the Bible study.

But it was something that stuck with me where it wasn't just those significant moments. 

I started to think about the places where God had just showed up in miraculous ways in my life.

So it was just a thought in my head. And I would have conversations with God about it and say, I would like to do a project like this one day.

I would like to do a project like this one day. And then, of course, life was happening, and I was going through difficult things.

And then one.

One night,

it was probably. Probably around midnight, I got woken up by the Lord in August of 2022,

and he said, here's the structure for your memorial stones project that you want to do. I want you to take the tribes of Israel,

study the names, the meanings of the names, and then talk to me about where I showed up in your life in that way.

Just very similar to Rachel and Leah and Bilhah and Zilpa. Right.

So I was like, okay, so that's how the. That's how the project began.

Jan: Don't you love how I just dropped something in your mind and you're thinking about it? But then when he goes, okay, here's how you're going to do it.

Brenda: Yeah.

Jan: And I have things like in a dream or something about how something is going to happen or pull together when it's like, oh, that's a good idea.

Brenda: Yeah. Yeah.

Jan: Because I guess God never sleeps.

Brenda: Exactly. You know, and I've. And I've learned I dream a lot. And so I've learned to say to him,

you know,

for my nighttime prayers, like, if you want to keep talking to me, you're welcome to.

Jan: Yeah, I was.

Had another podcast, and he was saying. He, you know, in the morning, just saying, well, walk with me, Lord. And he's going. And he. He stops and he says,

I'm always walking with you.

Where are you? You're just not. You're the one that needs to be.

Brenda: That's so funny. I have a friend, very similar. She always says, all right, Jesus, come on, let's sit down.

And she said. She said it one day, and he was like, I'm already sitting down. You're the one who isn't.

I know.

Jan: I think we gotta reverse some of our thinking. I. So. So each of your chapters is based on a different.

Brenda: Yeah, it's. It's based on the. The. Each of the names of the tribes of Israel.

Jan: Okay.

Brenda: And then also including Manasseh and Ephraim, even though they're half tribes. So it ends up being 14 stones. We have. Yeah.

Jan: And so then each thing.

Each thing that God taught them in there is what you. So that's really.

To what I've got. So. Because I go through mine is set up as a. Because of this. This happened. Resulting in. So it's kind of a secular. You know, I wouldn't be here if this had not happened,

you know, and those type of things. But then I take that same format With Ruth,

Jonah, Joseph, and David.

And so then he goes through. Where was God in those situations where they took him? Because of this has happened, you know, and whatever. Where was God there?

Where in your life have you seen the same kind of things happen as well?

Brenda: That's so good. Yeah, that's. Yeah, that's similar. Yeah, I love that. I can't wait to check out your. Your Bible study.

Jan: I know, the same. Same, same. Yeah. So years is set up to do that. You could do as a singular Bible study or with other people.

Brenda: Yeah, it's set up. You can do it singular.

But, you know, doing things in community is always.

Is always great, too, because you get to process while you're doing it.

So I think most of my readers so far have done it as individually.

I'm. I'm hoping I have some, like, group book, like, bundles. I'm hoping that some people might engage in it in a group setting and. And that I could pop in on their group and just see how things are going.

Jan: Yeah, because you could. You could pop in just on a zoom as well, you know. I thought about that as well, you know?

Brenda: Yeah. Yeah. So I would. That. That's something I would like to do, actually. A friend of mine,

she purchased my book, and then she leads a Bible study. So she gathered some of her friends and they did it.

And then on their last session, I just popped in on their Bible study. So that was fun.

Jan: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Mine, I included videos, short videos of my personal stories of whatever.

Brenda: Oh, that's awesome. I love that.

Jan: Yeah. So it just makes it a little bit more personal to.

Brenda: It does, because then they see the face and they hear the personal stories, and I think it's the personal stories that help us to connect with it in our own lives, where it just.

It doesn't seem, like, hard to grasp.

Mm.

Jan: And you see somebody else is going through it too.

Brenda: Exactly, exactly.

Jan: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, deep subjects.

Brenda: So what about.

Jan: Have you seen,

like, some ripple effects of some things that have.

From your stones. What. Let's say. Let's say.

I don't know. Name. Name one.

One of the things that you were. Your moments.

Brenda: Um, so one of the moments.

So I go by the meanings of the.

The names. Right. So Dan is vindicated.

And I went through a situation at my job that was a very difficult situation that just. It spanned over months.

And God vindicated me in that,

you know, and it's. It's part of the vindication, too, is that he does it, not us.

So I had to lay down all of my fighting and what I thought I needed to do and just let him go ahead and fight my battle for me.

Jan: Yeah,

yeah,

yeah, yeah. That's actually in mine is a comparison of Tamar, you know, when David's daughter, Tamar, and all of that after she was raped.

But it was in a miraculous.

Just in the middle of worship where God vindicated me and just had the.

My perpetrator, you know, on his knees and. And telling him to go,

you know, get away from him, not to come back, whatever. But then just to say I vindicated you, and.

Brenda: Yeah.

Jan: Wrapped his arms around me and whatever.

Brenda: Oh, wow. Well, I'm sorry you went through that, but I'm so glad God was there for you.

Jan: But that's it. I mean, that's the whole thing, is that God's there, you know. Yeah. At the bottom line.

Brenda: Right. Yeah. That is.

Jan: God is there, you know, so.

And then I think, too. So as you're doing and sharing your stories in there, too, and other people, you're gonna have this whole ripple effect of how.

How they see that or maybe that. Just those little words that you put in there that move them.

Brenda: Yeah. I mean, I've had some. I had a friend who messaged me after she read the first memorial stone,

and she said when she sat down to answer the questions, it was so deep that when she was done, she called her therapist and made an appointment because she realized that there were some things she needed to work through.

And so she was just so grateful. She's like, the. The book has caused me to actually start working on some of these other. And she had been to therapy before,

but, you know, sometimes there's layers to things.

Jan: Oh, there's always layers.

Brenda: Yeah.

Jan: No, and that's the thing in the. In a group setting, too, is that everybody, when they share their own stories of what they're going through, that's where,

first of all, it builds you closer as a group, you know,

together.

Brenda: Yeah.

Yeah. I love group things.

I love sharing stories.

I love hearing where other people are.

I think it's. And God built us for community,

so I think that's just a natural part of who we are and how we should be.

Jan: And the truth that he shows you, maybe he hasn't shown that yet to somebody else. And then on that, you know.

Brenda: Yeah. Yeah. And we can walk with each other in those journeys. So. Yeah.

Jan: I think, too, that just part of. I don't think. I think pain was meant to be. Because when are you closest to God?

Brenda: Yeah. When you're in pain. Yeah, yeah.

Jan: When are you learning most, leaning on him most, or, you know.

Brenda: Right. We tend to run to him more when we're going through difficult things and when we're in pain.

Yeah, that. That tends to be the default. Then when things are going well,

we're like, here.

Jan: Oh, that was a good devotional. And then you go on, you know, but it's not like your heart seeking after him, and. Really?

Brenda: Yeah.

And part of my challenge, too, part of my journey has been because I learned to mask pain,

that I was even masking my pain with him.

So part of my journey that I had to walk through was not pretending with him and actually giving him my real pain, not my little polished and glossed and, you know, perfectly packaged pain.

Because, yeah, that was. That was definitely one of my challenges.

Jan: Well, two things happened there. One is you got to know God better, and then you trusted him more.

Brenda: Yeah, yeah.

Jan: Because all of that takes trust.

Brenda: Exactly.

Jan: You know.

Brenda: Yeah. And that was the point that at the. At the end of it, it was like, oh, you're not actually trusting me with your. With the fullness of your pain, Brenda.

Like, I want all of it.

And I'm like, oh, I don't know that I can trust you with it.

Jan: But you found out.

Brenda: I did. I did. Yeah, absolutely.

Jan: Yeah.

Brenda: And.

Jan: And funny side effect is that he already knew everything.

Brenda: He did. He did. And he just wanted me to know that I could come to him with all of that and to know that he wouldn't react the way I had experienced other humans react with my pain.

So. Yeah.

Jan: Yeah,

yeah. I think, you know, it's a whole father thing, too. You know, if your dad wasn't part of your life or didn't. Wasn't what you thought he should be or something, and then you project that onto God, too, then that's,

you know.

Brenda: Yeah. That was a big lesson for me as well. I remember I. I thought I knew him as father,

and then one day he said to me,

actually,

you know me as provider.

You haven't gotten to know me as father.

And I was like, oh.

Jan: Well, you haven't got, you know, at that point, had not gotten to. To know him as Abba father.

Brenda: Mm.

Jan: I was.

Brenda: Yeah.

Jan: As your dad.

Brenda: Yeah, exactly. Yeah.

Jan: Yeah. Because there's so many facets, you know, friend and father and. And daddy and provider and, you know, all. All of those.

Brenda: Yeah, yeah. That was a. That was hard for me. That was. That was one of those where I had to give him that pain.

And because I could tend to be a perfectionist,

Right. So I'm like, no, no, no, no. Like, my relationship with you has been great. I have been. I have been seeing you as father. And he's like, no, no, you haven't.

So.

Jan: Yeah, it's just a tiny. It's a tiny reflection. You know what you see instead of the whole sunrise. Right?

Brenda: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Jan: There's a little bit of gold. What has been one of your moments where you needed courage?

Brenda: So one of the times was this was the first time this ever happened.

God told me to leave my job and single, had just purchased a home, so I'd used up a good amount of my savings.

And he said, yeah, no, it's time for you to rest.

And that was the scariest thing at that time.

That was. That was the scariest thing to date.

And so even I. I knew it. I don't know if this has ever happened to you where you actually know something. God is telling you, but you're like, oh, let me fast and see what he's gonna say about this.

Jan: Sounds like the fleece, huh?

Brenda: Yeah. Yeah.

Jan: Let me. Let me see if there's dew on there in the morning, then we'll see. Well, let's see if there's no dew on there the next morning,

then I'll really know.

Brenda: Yeah.

So, like, I knew it. I. I knew. I knew he was leading me in that direction.

I just didn't like how he was doing it. And then I was like, oh, let me just fast. I'm gonna fast for three days.

And day one of my fast,

in the afternoon, a friend of mine text me.

And I hadn't. I hadn't talked to her about what I was thinking. I hadn't told her I was fasting. She didn't know I was thinking of leaving my job.

And she said, yeah, I had a dream about you last night. You left your job.

Jan: Okay.

Brenda: And then even after that, I'm like, ah, now I gotta. I gotta do this. I started writing my letter of resignation and I wrote it and even then I just, like, stared at it because I'm like, am I.

Am I really gonna do this? This scary.

Yeah.

Jan: Was it a job you were uncomfortable in?

Brenda: It was.

So I'd been in the hospitality management field for. For years and years and years. And then I moved to a new city and we were opening a hotel in that city and the workload was intense and I burned out.

We were like. There was a good three months I was working without days off.

And even when I was.

Did have days off, we were working 18 hour days.

So I got to a place to where I was completely burned out.

But to be fair,

leading up to that,

a few years before that,

I knew God was telling me I wasn't gonna be in that field much longer.

So it was kind of like a setup. But it was a rough one.

It was a rough one which led.

Jan: Into you learning to be dependent on God.

Brenda: It absolutely did. Yeah. I had to be dependent. And it was interesting when I went into that season. Jan of when I left my job a few weeks after that, I was on my knees and just crying out to God and saying, like, what are we doing?

How am I going to make money?

And as I was praying, in my mind's eye, I saw a massive tree just start to fall in my backyard. Like, it started all the way at the end, and it was crashing, crashing, crashing.

Crashed through the fence, went through my neighbor's yard and the next yard and the next yard and the next yard.

And so I said to God, like, what is that? And he said to me, that's your idol of self sufficiency.

Ooh. And we need to tear it down. Yeah.

Jan: Wow.

Brenda: Yeah.

Jan: Yeah,

yeah, yeah.

Well, and there's another whole topic. I mean, the things that we do make idols of, you know, that we don't even really think about it at the time.

Brenda: No.

Jan: Living your day and doing everything that you do and whatever, and then you don't stop to. It's kind of God has to do, like, a little whammy, you know?

Brenda: Right.

Jan: Yeah.

Brenda: Because I didn't think I was. I had an idle self sufficiency. I just thought, I'm being a responsible person. I'm working,

you know, I'm. I'm. I'm doing the things that we do right as responsible adults, saving this, that, and the other.

And it was,

for me,

because of my heart posture, it was an idol of self sufficiency.

Jan: Yeah.

Well, okay.

Been learning. I see you learning along the way. Good job.

Job. You got an A now on this. You got an A.

When. When have you seen him be faithful?

Brenda: So interesting in that season, really,

and. And beyond that. But in that season when I wasn't working,

I.

There were times I couldn't pay some of my bills,

but I didn't lose anything. I didn't lose my house.

My utilities never got disconnected.

My food, my fridge was never empty.

He was just consistently faithful through that.

And it's so funny, because I'll look back on that season and be like, how? I don't even know how I made it, but he was Faithful.

Definitely faithful in that. So that I think I would say that was the first time I really experienced literally having to depend on God and seeing,

like,

literally daytoday. Faithfulness.

Jan: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well. And. And he became your husband?

Brenda: Yes.

Yes, absolutely.

Yeah, absolutely. I had to. He. He was my husband. He was my everything. I didn't have anyone else. And, Jan, I'll be honest with you. It's not like I just.

In that season that I wasn't working, that I was just content with that I did go out and look for jobs,

and I would get rejections for jobs that I was well qualified for, like, rejection after rejection after rejection.

And then eventually I did just find, like, a small job serving.

And he. For some reason, he allowed me to go to that job, but I never made enough money to pay the bills.

And then one day he said to me, he reminded me of that scripture in Proverbs about not being a dog that goes back to its vomit.

Jan: Oh, yeah. Okay.

Brenda: Yeah.

Jan: All right. All right. What other plans do you have for me then? Right, I'm. I'm listening.

Brenda: So I. So the next day, I resigned from that job.

Jan: Oh, my goodness. Oh, geez. So you do something that you call clarity conversations. Tell us about that.

Brenda: Yeah. So my clarity conversations, I found that I had a gift if, like, friends would tell me, oh, whenever I have a conversation with you, I can see clearly how.

What ideas I have. And you show me the thread on how to make these things work.

And so with the clarity conversations, it's about.

So what happened with me was when I sat on my bed and reflecting at 30,

when my divorce was happening,

I realized that there was so many dreams I had put on the shelf because of life. And it wasn't horrible things. It wasn't a bad thing for me to support my husband.

And so with the clarity conversations, it's particularly for women over 40. Right. Who've lived life and who've had to put things on hold. So we have a conversation about what are the things that you've put on hold?

And how do we get to a place to where you can actually start doing them and activating them? And then. And I help just guide through and find a good starting place, a sustainable starting place to start with that.

And even if.

Because sometimes women come to me and they're like, I. I don't even know what I want to do,

but through having conversation, I can draw out what they want to do. So.

Yeah.

Jan: Wow. That sounds amazing.

Brenda: Yeah.

Jan: Yeah. Ministry.

Brenda: Thank you. Thank you.

Jan: Yeah.

And again,

when you Go back, you can look through all your, all of your stones and say, I've been here, been here, been,

you know, and here's where maybe I can see that in you. Where maybe this is how God could direct you.

Brenda: And yeah, yeah. I have a friend who we, we've done a couple of them and each time,

like the first one got her to a specific place and then the second one got her even further.

So yeah,

it's, it's, it's really great. I enjoy doing it. It's like so easy for me.

Jan: Uh huh.

Brenda: So yeah.

Jan: Yeah. Then it's a gift.

Brenda: Thank you. Yeah, it is a gift. And that's another interesting thing too. I think even in my journey with the Lord was learning what are my gifts and how he wants me to use them.

That was challenging.

I don't know if it's been the same for you, but just learning like, oh God, this is a gift and you want me to use it because there have been even this gift of writing.

I squashed it because I didn't realize it was a gift.

And so. Yeah,

yeah.

Jan: But then again, he only gives you a vision for things that he knows you're gonna be able to do.

Brenda: Exactly.

Jan: You know.

Brenda: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Jan: When he said to me, start a podcast, I'm gone. Okay, about this. But. But it has been one of the best things I've ever done.

Brenda: Yeah. That's awesome. I'm so glad. Yeah. I watched your most recent episode with Lovatis. Yeah, yeah. What a story. My goodness.

Jan: Yeah, yeah.

Brenda: Wow. But you look like you were having so much fun.

Jan: They are fun. Yeah, yeah. Tell everybody how they can reach you.

Brenda: The best way to reach me is through my website, brendasavanu.com. that's where my book is and that is where Clarity Conversations is. So that's, that's the easiest place, one stop shop.

Just go to brendasawanu.com perfect.

Jan: I will put that in the show notes.

Brenda: Thank you.

Jan: What would you like to leave our listeners with?

Brenda: Yeah, my friends say to me if. My friends say to me all the time, they like, if you, whenever you go and ask Brenda, what do you think about this? What do you think about that?

She always says, well, have you talked to the Lord?

Jan: Good advice.

Brenda: Right.

And, and I'm always happy to do it with them. So sometimes even on the conversation, I'll just say, well, let's just pause.

Let's invite in Holy spirit, let's invite in Jesus and let's just see, you know, what's being said.

So the advice that I would give is that I want to leave the listeners with is cultivate your relationship with the Lord,

sit with him,

listen for his voice. You know, whether it's through doing your Bible studies or my journal or just reading the Bible, however you do that,

I think the most important thing is that we have to sit with God,

hear his voice, know his voice,

because ultimately, he's the one who's going to guide us through all of these things. And then even in the story I stories I've told and how I squashed my gifts,

had I been listening to him, I wouldn't have. Right. I would have been working in my gifts a long time ago.

So.

Jan: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, so good. All right. Thank you, Brenda.

Brenda: Thank you so much, Jan. This was so much fun.