Obedience Over Ambition with Janessa Sablan

So… you’ve graduated from high school and now what?

Do you just find a job?

Or should you go to college?

And if so, where? Where does God want to lead you?

So many paths available to you. 

My guest today is Janessa Sablan

 I’ve known Janessa since she was probably in middle school.

Her dad led youth group that my kids attended.

Then she participated in theater that I directed for a number of years.

In this episode we’ll hear how she sought God’s plan for what was

Next in her life and how that played out going to community college

And then out of state to a Christian college in Colorado.

You’ll love her exuberance and perspectives.

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Transcript

Jan: Welcome to Just Talking About Jesus. I'm Jan Johnson, a seasoned believer who loves relationships and, you know, just talking about Jesus.

Janessa Sablan: Everyone's walk with God is different. You know, he's building us up for different things and different purposes, and I think that's where I have to come at it from. Is not, what are you doing?

It's just, are you being obedient to God? Are you being obedient to his voice?

Jan: It's not all about this thing.

Janessa Sablan: Yeah.

Jan: About being.

Janessa Sablan: It's. It kind. It starts with what's inside.

Jan: Janessa Sablan. Welcome to Just Talking About Jesus.

Janessa Sablan: Hi there.

Jan: We haven't seen each other for a while, huh?

Janessa Sablan: I know. I. I feel like. It's just, you know, so much has gone by, and I'm just like, oh, my goodness, what happened?

Jan: Not since high school, you know? Yeah. Because we did all those fun theater things together.

Janessa Sablan: Yes.

Jan: All of those experiences.

Janessa Sablan: I know. When I go up to the school, that's all I think about. Like, oh, I used to do drama here and play practice, and. Oh, it was kidding. I know.

I miss it. I miss it.

Jan: I know. And then they tore down all the stage and everything. Put the band in there, whatever. I knew that was going to happen.

The last day I was in there, I was just standing there looking around. I'm thinking, am I gonna be okay if that happens?

Janessa Sablan: I know.

Jan: And it was like. Yeah. That's how I knew it was time.

Janessa Sablan: I know. I know. It's so many good memories, but. Yeah, it was. It was so wonderful. I loved every moment of it.

Jan: Yes.

Janessa Sablan: That's what brought me out of my shell, so.

Jan: And good friendships, you know?

Janessa Sablan: Oh, yes. Absolutely. I loved every moment. It was like the. The chaos of the night, of the. The show is just, like the stress and the adrenaline running through my body.

But then it was like we were all nervous together, and then on the stage, and it was like. It just melted away all the stress. It was just so much fun.

It just like. Yeah, I. I miss it so much.

Jan: It was really good. Yeah. I still have dreams, you know, with theater things, you know?

Janessa Sablan: Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah. My. My mom still remembers, and she loves it. Yeah. It was so fun. Yeah.

Jan: Well, what's better than watching your daughter.

Janessa Sablan: I know. Performing. I know her and dad in the sound booth all the time. That's what I remember the most. Mm.

Jan: Coming through for us. So after high school, where'd you go? What'd you do?

Janessa Sablan: So I ended up. Well, I got my GED when I was about 17, so I was able to kind of start getting integrated into Clatsup Community College right in Astoria. So that was really nice.

And it was funny going in. I was. I mean, I've been homeschooled. I was homeschooled my whole life up until I got my ged. And so coming out of that and going straight into a classroom setting full with, you know, a large range of ages of adults was like, scary non belief.

I was like, what am I doing? What have I decided to do? Like, where am I at? It was. It was crazy. But the Lord really did use that chaotic setting.

Not chaotic. It was chaotic to me. Cause I'd never been in a classroom before. So he used it really to grow me up. So I ended up staying at Clatsop for the full two years.

And I got my associate's degree in arts. It was a transfer degree. And I was still trying to figure out what I wanted to do. I was like. At first it was like, oh, I'll go into psychology.

And I was like, no, I'll go into philosophy. Well, no. And it's just like, you go through, like, what do I want to do? Like, what's the.

Jan: Wanted to do those fields.

Janessa Sablan: I. Well, psychology.

I wanted. I was like, well, maybe I'll get into like therapy or counseling, you know, because, like, you know, I do enjoy that kind of stuff, like the whole side of that.

And then I knew I really wanted to serve in ministry. And so I didn't know where to begin with that. I was like, I don't. I don't know where you start with ministry.

Like, what does that look like? And so I was like, well, I need to go to a Christian college probably and major in something that has to do with like, scripture and the Word and kind of understanding that.

And so at first thinking about it, I was like, well, I'll be an apologist. I'll be a Christian apologist, and I'll be a debater. And I will. You know, that sounds like such a rush and amazing and such an awesome thing to do.

And I really went for it. And I was like, okay, we're gonna do this. And so I was like, I'll measure in philosophy, you know, because that deep thinking and all that and, you know, really planning debates out.

And I began praying one day. I was just like, lord, I don't know. Is it. Is it philosophy? I don't know. I have no idea. And I was kind of just sitting in my room praying, reading the Word, just like, really trying to stay quiet too, because I feel like Sometimes when you, when you pray, it's like we just hear ourselves talking and we're not actually listening to God.

So it's just like I went quiet. And at, in the, in the prayer, I had asked God what school to do I go to because I'm going to major in philosophy.

What school do I go to? Do I go out of state or do I stay in state? And as I'm praying this, I kind of go quiet. And then in, in the silence and in my mind I hear the word theology.

And I was like, excuse me, I asked you what school you wanted me to go to.

What school, Lord? And again, theology. And I was like, oh, wait a minute, that's a major. That is something I could major in. Okay, I understand where you're going with this now.

It was just one of those moments where you kind of have an out of body experience of like, did that happen? Did I hear theology or was I telling myself theology?

So I'm going backtracking in my head. I'm like, I have never ever thought once to go out and get a theology degree. Like, never. It was always philosophy or psychology.

And so I was like, okay, Lord, I'm gonna get a theology degree. And so I start looking around for schools to transfer to because clearly Clatsop had ended for me.

And I was looking into all these Christian colleges and then all of a sudden this random, like, video pops up into my YouTube feed as I was listening to music one day and it was a advertisement for Colorado Christian University.

And I was like, Colorado?

Jan: Where? Where even is that? I know, I've never been there. I know.

Janessa Sablan: I was like, wait, I was looking in Oregon, not Colorado. And I was nervous, Honestly, the idea of going out of state. The next thing I know I'm like emailing with an admissions counselor and he's getting me all set up to transfer everything over.

And yeah, next thing I know, I'm in Colorado.

Jan: Isn't it funny how God tells you to do something and he makes it all.

Janessa Sablan: Yes.

Jan: Happen.

Janessa Sablan: It falls together. All I had to do was just listen instead of keep talking. And it was going to fall together. Yes, it was. It was just amazing. Just because I was so confused.

I was so nervous of making the wrong decision that I was just like, I got so wrapped up in the logistics of it all. And so, yeah, I was in.

Jan: But easy to do because it's new territory for you.

Janessa Sablan: Absolutely. You know, it's. It's hard.

Jan: And you had to adult.

Janessa Sablan: That is my thing. I'm still struggling with that. 1. And I'm like, oh my goodness. Like, I'm tired.

When does it stop?

But no, it's, it really, it's been an adventure of hearing God's voice. I think that's what it has been a lot of is not hearing my voice and just turning myself off to listen to God has been that.

So, yes, I was in Colorado. Denver, Colorado, to be more specific. And that was, I mean, looking back now, it was, that in itself was such a crazy thing. I didn't know anyone in Colorado.

My parents and I flew out there the day of and then they left their baby girl. They did. I was like, oh my goodness.

Jan: I didn't see your dad's expression.

Janessa Sablan: It was so sad. They, like had to take the Uber to the airport and all this crazy, like, celebration is happening on campus, but they have to leave because they're airplane is going to be flying off soon.

And so they're like, oh my goodness, the Uber's here. We have to hurry up, we have to get in the car. So they quickly grab all their things, they say, goodbye, I love you.

And they hop in the car and they leave. And I walk into my empty dorm room.

Jan: Is that when you start crying?

Janessa Sablan: I close. As soon as I close the door to the bathroom, it was tears. I was like, what did I do? I don't know anyone here. This is a whole new territory.

Like, mom and dad are basically just gone now. Like, what am I doing? And I was so scared. And then I joined back in the celebration of the first day before school.

And it was like the Lord just kind of gave me peace about everything. Like it was okay. Like, yeah, you're away from home and you don't know anyone and you, you're probably going to be in a lot more of a rigorous academic place than Clatsop Community College, which Clatsop was a blessing.

Jan: It's a good transition.

Janessa Sablan: But it was like going from Clatsop schooling to Colorado Christian schooling. The professors were like top notch, high standards. If you don't do wellness, that's on you. And I don't, doesn't emotionally affect me at all.

Which I'm like, that's valid. So.

Jan: Right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a big deal. You know, it is trying to do and, and deciding what you're doing and where you're going to end up. And even still it's like, okay, so I got this theology degree now what am I gonna, what am I supposed to do that?

Janessa Sablan: Yes.

Jan: Am I going to be able to make money with that? So I could actually live on my own or is that going to be.

Janessa Sablan: Yeah, it's, it's true. I, you know, I, I have thought about that a lot, and I think one of the things I concluded my senior year was the theology degree was more so for me than it was for a career because it grew me up.

It forced me to have to ask questions about my own face that I'd never really thought before and kind of put up what is important.

Jan: What were some of the things that were there, some mind shifts in things while you're going to college or, you know, and the things that you were learning.

Janessa Sablan: And the things I was learning, I think for me personally, it was things that I had believed. I was given tools to kind of articulate a little better about what I believed.

That's really what it was because I was surrounded and a lot of different thought within the Christian denomination. You know, there's so many different beliefs on. On many things. And so I think that was one of the things.

It wasn't necessarily as much my mind was changed as much as I was given tools, because it was like I, I read the Bible, you know, I'd grown up, I've grown up Christian my whole life.

And so. But to, to have the tools to be able to kind of sift out what it is, I believe that.

Jan: And to also make it your own.

Janessa Sablan: Yes, to make it. That was the other thing too. Where the growing up needed to happen was it was like I was, I was. It's just Janessa, adult Janessa, like living life with God and he.

This by his spirit, you know, kind of refining what it is I believe, you know, by Scripture and the Holy Spirit. And so, yes, that was, I think that was hard, too, because there was a lot of people that.

A lot of differing thoughts and a lot of persuasive words and not that they were trying to be devious in any way, but their words versus what Scripture says. And, and again, it's like everyone has, you know, I believe this because of what this says in Scripture.

And then, you know, and then someone counters that and says, well, no, that's not what Scripture means. And so, yeah, that's what I encountered a lot. And often I would have to do arguments based off of.

I would have to argue for views that I didn't hold, which was interesting. Yeah, very interesting in my systematic theology class, that one. We had to have debates and have to have arguments and counter arguments and try to guess what the other person was going to say to us.

And so it was Interesting coming from the point of view that I didn't stand with necessarily, I didn't agree with or I didn't view, you know, necessarily. And so that was an interesting thing, too.

Jan: That would be really interesting. Plus the value in that is when you're talking to non believers or anything that helps you maybe have some idea of where they're at.

Janessa Sablan: Exactly. Yes, exactly. And so one of the biggest things that I learned probably in college, which is I feel like it's very. It's very basic, but it's needed if you're going to.

To live life as a Christian in this world is.

Is to care about the soul and the person before. You just jump to conclusions about them. I think a lot of times, because of fear and anticipation, we automatically throw up a guard and a shield.

Whether it's like this Christian doesn't believe necessarily what I believe, or this non believer said they don't like Christians.

Well, one thing I learned at school was you get to know them first. Know them as a person. You know, know them. You know, God created this person too.

Jan: Yeah.

Janessa Sablan: Show them that respect, that dignity of being a human being. Yeah. They don't share the same view as you, but that doesn't make them your. Your opposite or, you know, someone that you have to go against.

It's not just not how it goes. So that's one thing I had to learn in school because of my own fear of, like, oh, my goodness, like, this person's gonna see me as an enemy now.

And it's like, well, no, you see him as human being.

Jan: Yeah.

Janessa Sablan: You know, that's.

Jan: You earn your right to be heard, though.

Janessa Sablan: Yes.

Jan: By becoming a friend first. You earn your right.

Janessa Sablan: Yes. That. That trust, that respect.

Jan: And the other thing is, it's not our responsibility whether they believe or they don't.

Janessa Sablan: Exactly. Exactly.

Jan: Because God's gonna draw them or, you know.

Janessa Sablan: Yeah, we just. We give the truth. We lay the truth before them, and they will do what they want with it. And so, yeah, it was. It was seeing them as a human being and a.

And a image bearer and being able to speak up for myself and speak the truth. Those are the part. It sounds funny. I go to this big, private Christian school, and at the end of the day, those are some of my two biggest ones.

It was like God really used that to shape me more and to kind of chisel away things that I was holding onto that weren't necessary.

Jan: Yeah.

Janessa Sablan: And not even. And to a degree, weren't. Okay. Because I was quiet and didn't want to make any waves and, you know, and now it's kind of becoming more. Well, no, speak up for yourself.

Speak your mind. You know, you don't have to do with pride and anger, but you can speak up and it's okay. And if someone's offended, that's their own problem at the end of the day, like, you can still love them with kind words of truth, you know, even.

Jan: Like the idea of what I post on Facebook or Instagram or something, you know, and for a long time I just was neutral about anything. I didn't, you know, I might say he is risen at Easter or, you know, something like that, but not blatantly anything.

Janessa Sablan: Yes.

Jan: And I thought, why am I doing that? Because it's not really where my heart is, you know, and plus, you don't know who's going to read something. But last week was the first time someone said something back that was like, this is wrong on so many levels.

And I thought, oh. Huh.

I said, well, okay.

And I said, well, I'm glad that everybody has the opportunity to choose.

Janessa Sablan: Yes.

Jan: You know.

Janessa Sablan: Yes. I. You have to respect the person, you.

Jan: Know, and the first thing I always think is, where's your hurt?

Janessa Sablan: That's the other thing I think that I. I had to learn was I came a lot across a lot of people who had past experiences that kind of shaped their views.

And so that was difficult too, because it was like, well, now I don't want to hurt this person even more because of the pain that they are probably carrying from the past.

Jan: I think that's where you listen, you know, that's.

Janessa Sablan: I mean, that's. I've always been kind of the person that listens to other people's stories, but it's kind of God kind of helped show me. As you're listening, try to. Try to just see.

See where they're coming from. Because it's not. It's not a way. Oh, a way to, like, try to use them or control them. It's more like try to see where they're coming from so you can see how you can serve them.

You can see how you can show them, my love.

Jan: Yeah.

Janessa Sablan: Because it's. We're not robots. It's not like we just take information in. It's like we all have our own perspective. We all have our own experiences, and we need to be willing to listen to them so we can properly show the love of God.

Right.

Jan: You know, so I have this friend and she's. She always says, well, so tell me more about that.

Janessa Sablan: Yes.

Jan: And I think wow, what a great. What a great line. You know, it is. I mean, you're not. You're not refuting what they're saying, but you're trying to understand where they're coming from.

Just tell me more about that.

Janessa Sablan: Yes. It's okay to pause and take a break and take a breath. I think that's something I also really struggled with in college, was I felt like I had to have an answer right then and there, and I couldn't take a breath.

And so it's funny, one of the things my dad told me, he's like, hey, it's okay if you don't know the answer.

Jan: Yeah.

Janessa Sablan: You don't need to know the answer on the spot. You can tell them respectfully, hey, I don't have.

Jan: Hey, you don't need to know. You can just ask AI and I know, right?

Janessa Sablan: Just ask AI Chat GPT. It'll tell you.

Yeah. He's like, you can. You can say it. I can't answer that question, but I'd love to answer it if you allow me to just do a little more research on it and I'll come back.

I'll come back with an answer for you, you know? Yeah. Yeah. That push, though, that fear of have the answer now was, yeah.

Jan: Yeah. And I think part of that comes with, what are they gonna think about me if I don't have that answer? Or, you know, and it comes back to your value.

Janessa Sablan: Yes.

Jan: You know, and so that's. That's the thing, I think, that stops people.

Janessa Sablan: It does that fear of being seen differently or being pushed out or outcasted.

Yeah. That. It doesn't matter if you're in high school or you are an adult. It's still something you. Everyone struggles with. And the first step is to actually address it and push against it, push back against it.

Because it's like the more you practice it.

Jan: Yeah.

Janessa Sablan: The more it's going to kind of take over everything else.

Jan: Invite people into your life, you know?

Janessa Sablan: Yeah.

Jan: Any people.

Janessa Sablan: Yes.

Jan: You know?

Janessa Sablan: Yes. It's good.

Jan: Not that you don't have to set boundaries sometimes. I mean.

Janessa Sablan: Yeah.

Jan: I mean, I'm not saying we hold.

Janessa Sablan: To the values and the beliefs as Christians. It's not like we're going to waver in that, but it's good to know the community you live in and the people that live in it.

Jan: Yeah.

Janessa Sablan: You know, Jesus didn't say in the synagogue he went out.

Jan: That's right.

Janessa Sablan: Walked the country sides.

Jan: Yeah.

Janessa Sablan: He met with these people. You know, he's some hard, rough people. Yes. Rough people that everyone else was scared to approach because they were like, oh, they're from the other side of the tracks.

Like, you know, but it's, you know, it's. So, yeah, that's something I, I think I love about being home now is like, I get to be in my community. This is my community.

I love it. It's. That's a beautiful place to grow up. I really do. I'm thankful that God brought me here. So.

Jan: Yeah. So what are you doing now?

Janessa Sablan: I am currently teaching at a private Christian school in Hammond. Anchor Christian Academy. I am a part time 8th grade teacher. We had a couple girls that did end up coming back and so we, you know, they were like, well, we don't want to turn them away.

You know, this is their last year and so let's, you know, let's create a space for them. And so thankfully, and I'm, I'm very grateful they asked me to be the part time 8th grade teacher.

And then also the other times being a teacher's aide, which has been a joy. So I get to do that. It's. Yeah, it's a blessing. I love it. It's. There's a lot, there's a lot of emotion, a lot of emotional things you go through throughout the day when you're like working in a school because of all the kids and their emotions.

Especially with 8th grade girls.

I love them so much. Like, they're amazing, but sometimes I'm like, I find myself getting like maybe a little heavy from the emotion in the room. But they're so funny.

They give me the hardest time. They always are teasing me. They're always trying to like call me old or you're short, Ms. Janessa or, you know, I just like eighth grade things and I'm like, oh my goodness, it's so much.

But yeah, I think the Lord's really been teaching me discipline and that. Just having my set times and being proactive and keeping up with things, you know, not, not procrastinating, not being lazy.

You know, if it has to get done, you do it now kind of thing. So yeah, yeah, I'm very thankful, very thankful for the job. Yeah, it's been great.

Jan: Where do you see yourself in five years?

Janessa Sablan: See myself in five years? Well, I would love to be married with my own kids and have my home and just be a mother. That is probably my ultimate dream, honestly, which I know the world would look at that and say, you're not going after the CEO job and at first.

Jan: Remember where we live.

Janessa Sablan: I know I'M like, CEO. What? I live out in the middle of nowhere.

But I. I do love the idea of being married and having my own family and raising them and just serving God in that. But right now, in the circumstances that I'm in, that's not happening in the foreseeable future, which.

It's God's timing all the way. Yeah, it's probably. I. I want to still work with kids. So, you know, if. If Lord is saying, you know, marriage is not in my plan for you, then I still want to work with kids.

I love working with kids. I love being goofy and funny and, you know, just. They're great to hang out, you know, it's just like, at the. At the end of the day, it turns out to hanging out, you know, you're just kind of all, like, together having fun and laughing and so working with kids, probably.

That's probably one of the things right now that I've been kind of thinking through is, where do you want me, God? Where am I working? Where am I living? Like, what am I?

Am I. Am I where you want me to be right now? And so, especially with the new start of the new year, that's kind of where my heart has been at.

And so I've been praying a lot, and my church has been praying.

I've had that support behind me. And so, yeah, it's just one of those things, like, God's timing. You gotta wait on him. I can't see anything in the future for myself, literally.

No. I don't feel God pushing me or propelling me in any direction. It's just kind of like staying faithful in where he's placed me, which is serving my church, working at the school, being with my family, and loving on them.

And so that's like, I feel like, just stay faithful in that. And then I know God will bring what he wants to bring. And so the waiting game, it hurts.

It hurts so much.

Jan: It does. Yeah, I know. The being satisfied with where you're at at the time.

Janessa Sablan: Yes. You know, the fear of, am I doing enough? I was talking to a friend from school, and we were kind of both in the same situation, living at home after school.

And she's like, I feel like I'm so behind on everything. And I. I was honest with her. I was like, I. I have that fear as well, that I'm behind that I'm not doing enough.

Because I'm comparing myself to the friends that are married, the friends that are having kids, the friends that are excelling in their career choice, and it's, yeah, it's, it's not good to compare at all.

But it is something I do still struggle with to a degree.

Jan: It's hard not to, you know. Yeah. To look at that. But yeah. Just being that satisfied where you are, it's just that's. But that's for everybody all through their lives is, you know, are you satisfied with where you are, you know, and where God has you?

If you really feel like you're seeking God and he has you where you are.

Janessa Sablan: Yes. And it's like that's where I find my satisfaction is knowing I'm where God wants me to be. And so the dissatisfaction comes when I'm like, oh my goodness, am I being lazy?

Am I procrastinating? Am I not pushing hard enough? And then I look at my schedule and my month by month and I'm like, I don't think I have space.

Jan: What should I be doing?

Janessa Sablan: I'm really tired right now. I think we're okay.

Jan: So.

Janessa Sablan: The Lord is always faithful to bring what he wants to bring. He easily, quite easily just pushes out what he doesn't want and brings in what he does. And so it's just, I think me and my flesh saying it's not enough.

Jan: Yeah.

Janessa Sablan: You know, the fear of, you know, not doing enough.

Jan: Well, I think the fact that you have, the relationship with God that you do have is miles above a lot of other people your age.

Janessa Sablan: Thank you.

Jan: You know, so, I mean, that's just.

Janessa Sablan: Yeah, I. Yeah. Yeah. The many thumps and pains that I put myself through I think have helped me grow up a little more.

Jan: Yeah. Yeah. But that's part of the journey.

Janessa Sablan: It is. And I, it, Yeah, I, I have to remember that. It's like I've been an adult for how long?

Jan: Yeah. I mean, you're still kind of a baby.

Janessa Sablan: Yeah, I'm like a 6-year-old adult at this point. It's. Yeah. You know, I haven't really been in the game that long and so.

Jan: Right.

Janessa Sablan: Yeah. And everyone's walk with God is different. You know, he's. He's building us up for different things and different purposes. And I think that's where I have to come at it from, is not what are you doing?

It's just, are you being obedient to God? Are you being obedient to his voice?

Jan: It's not all about doing this thing.

Janessa Sablan: Yeah.

Jan: It's about being, it's.

Janessa Sablan: It kind. It starts with what's inside. Right. You know, are you listening for God or are you listening for yourself?

Jan: Right.

Janessa Sablan: You know, and so it's. I think it's funny, the Lord kind of slowly speaks to me and is kind of like, you know, you need. There needs to be more discipline on this area of your life or more discipline here, you know, in school.

1 An example is like, I would stay up late into the night, probably in college.

Jan: Kid does.

Janessa Sablan: Yes. You know, I remember staying up till two in the morning and then having to get up at 6:30 the next morning, you know, and doing it all over again. And now it's like the Lord's like, well, no, you have to have a realistic time to go to sleep.

Like, that's not enough.

Jan: It's okay to rest.

Janessa Sablan: So it's like those basic small concepts. It's like, I have to first have discipline in those before anything else is going to come, you know, it's like, how am I going to be expected to do something with some larger that the Lord has for me if I can't even get down a basic.

That time, you know, so.

So it's. It hurts and it. And it burns. And the discipline of it just all, you know, there's definitely a struggle, but it's life and you're pushing through with God.

Jan: Exactly.

Janessa Sablan: He chisels away and he cleans up and he refines and you come out stronger in the end. And I love, I love what happens afterwards. It's just always beautiful. I can look back and think, wow, that was a lot.

That was worth it.

Jan: But it was worth it, right?

Janessa Sablan: It's always worth it.

Jan: It's always worth it.

Janessa Sablan: It's always worth it.

Jan: Yeah.

Janessa Sablan: So. Yes.

Jan: Well, Janelle said, thank you.

Janessa Sablan: Yeah, thank you. Wonderful time.